


All Will Be Well

by Impala_Dreamer



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Angst, Depression, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Attempt, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 10:34:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16911336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Impala_Dreamer/pseuds/Impala_Dreamer
Summary: ~Jared finds Y/N at her lowest and tries to remind her to be strong~





	All Will Be Well

The lights were off, but he could see her well enough by the light he let in from the hall. She was huddled in the shadows; the cold tile offering little comfort as she sat in the space behind the bathroom door.

Her knees were up, hands clutching her ankles, her eyes wide and red, staring blankly ahead at the line of bottles that decorated the tub ledge.

Jared’s heart nearly stopped as he followed her gaze to the line up. Four orange and white prescription bottles were standing on the porcelain lip, meticulously placed equidistant apart, their labels all facing Y/N, their caps still tightly closed. A bottle of Jack, mostly full, sat in the very center of the small bathroom, halfway between Y/N and the bottles. Its cap was off and nowhere that Jared could see, and the familiar smell filled the air.

His whisper broke the silence, but not her stupor. “Y/N/N?” He stepped fully inside and shut the door so he could look her over. Her fingers flexed against her feet and her breath was slow, but otherwise she was still. A bit of white gauze was stuck to the crook of her arm, and Jared could see the edge of where some blood had soaked through. His hope fell, and so did he, slowly sitting down on the cramped floor next to his friend. He pushed his back against the door and stretched his legs out, missing the whiskey, but planting his feet flat on the tub. His arm rubbed against hers as he settled in, but Y/N didn’t move or seem to notice.

“You didn’t answer your phone,” he said softly, pressing his head against the hollow wood behind him.

“It’s off,” she whispered. Her voice was raw and low, and she grit her teeth at the effort of moving to speak.

“That explains it then,” he replied with a weak smile. “Well, we missed you today. Jensen says hi.”

Y/N let out a rough breath. “I don’t want to talk.”

“You don’t have to,” he said with a nod and looked back at the tub. “Did you take anything?” he asked because he had to.

She didn’t speak, but shook her head no.

“That’s good.”

“I wanted to.”

“I’m glad you didn’t.”

Y/N closed her eyes and Jared saw a tear escape. It slid unwanted and unattended down her cheek, leaving a ghost trail behind that sparkled even in the dark.

“Did something happen?” he asked, turning his eyes but not his head.

“I said I don’t wanna talk.”

Jared nodded again and crossed his arms and ankles, settling in. “OK.”

The clock above them ticked slowly, the seconds echoing in the emptiness. Jared began to count them subconsciously, and when he reached two hundred and three, Y/N broke his concentration with a heavy sob that shook her shoulders and knocked her against his side.

“Hey, hey, it’s alright,” he said, turning towards her and placing a hand on her arm.

“I can’t…”

Jared ran his hand firmly up and down her arm from elbow to shoulder. “Can’t what?”

“I can’t…do this anymore.” Her cries were loud and the words barely made it out and over them. “I don’t want to. I want to stop. I want everything to stop.”

Jared placed a hand on her back. “It’s OK.”

“It’s not!”

“So you take a break,” he told her as he rubbed her back. “It’s allowed. You’re going a thousand miles a minute everyday. You don’t have to. You can stop and take care of yourself for once.”

Y/N shook her head and tried to shrug him away. “I want it all to stop. I can’t breathe anymore. I can’t think. It’s all… it’s all garbage. Everything I touch, everything I do. I ruin everything. I hurt everyone.” She paused the ramble as her breath became heavy. She gasped around her words, tears spilling freely now. “I can’t… I can’t keep this up. I’m done. I want it to be done.”

Jared stretched his arm across her shoulders and pulled her close, using his strength to stop her from pulling away. “You do not ruin everything, Y/N.” She struggled, but he held tight. “And you haven’t hurt anyone. I know you can’t hear this, I know your head won’t let you believe it, but I know. I believe it. I’ll remember it for you, OK?”

“Let me go,” she said, squirming against him.

“No.” He lifted his other arm and clasped his hands around her, leaving her nowhere to go but towards him. “I’m not letting you go. I love you.”

“You shouldn’t.” She cried into his chest, giving up and falling against him.

Jared placed a hand on the back of her head and his cheek to the top, holding her close. “I do love you, you know that. And I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me, darlin’.”

Y/N closed her eyes and pressed her face into his chest. Jared felt her tears, captured by the cotton of his shirt, but he didn’t care. Tears were good.

He pet her head and hummed as she cried. Her tears were hot and his touch was firm, steady. When her breathing calmed and the tears were gone, he pulled back and pressed a kiss on her forehead. He used his big thumbs to erase the tears, but the pain was still dark in her eyes.

“I know how hard this is, Y/N/N,” he said simply. “I know how much it hurts. But you have to fight it. You have to keep breathing.”

She looked up, exhausted and desperate. “What if I can’t?”

“Then you yell for me and I’ll come running.” He smiled and she laughed sadly. “Anytime. Day or night. You hear me?”

Y/N nodded and her smile faded, but she was calmer. “OK.”

“OK?” Jared bent his head and tried to catch her eyes.

“Yeah.”

Another kiss on her forehead and a hug that nearly crushed her. “All will be well, Y/N. I promise.”

 

Even though sometimes this is hard to tell

And the fight is just as frustrating as hell

All will be well

All will be well

Even after all the promises you’ve broken to yourself

All will be well

You can ask me how but only time will tell


End file.
